On occasion, I have lamented that communication with our girls (and guys) is somewhat difficult given the language barrier.  We understand some of what they say, of course, as in there is no mistaking the exultation of a hen who has just laid an egg.  Nor is it hard to know what the busy cluck-cluck-clucking is all about when they see us coming with treats.  And, even though they play dumb when we scold them for going AWOL under the fence, we know there is some understanding there – our tone of voice followed by coop lockdown, if nothing else.

But, yesterday when I was discussing chicken treats with a neighboring (well, Seaview) chicken farmer, I was thankful our conversation couldn’t be understood.  Not that the ladies and their consorts were anywhere nearby.  There was absolutely no danger of their overhearing the conversation (although, as I’ve said many times, “You never can tell with chickens.”)  Nevertheless, I couldn’t help thinking that what I was hearing would be better kept to myself.

It started with my Farmer Friend’s rather offhand remark that it’s hard for them to get chicken-sitters.  Since I didn’t know where he was going with that, I kept my own counsel about our wonderful chicken-sitting neighbors, but I did ask if there wasn’t someone who lived near them who wouldn’t mind checking in on their flock a couple of times a day.

“Well…” he said hesitantly, “the trouble is the treats.”  And, he went on to explain that their girls get treats three times a day.  At ten o’clock: cottage cheese.  At noon: dried meal worms.  At four o’clock: grapes. Talk about living the life of luxury!  Our girls and guys would no doubt go on strike for better ‘treat’ment if they knew.

The standard treat around here is cracked corn which they get at roll call in the morning and just before lock-down at night (sometimes).  Occasionally, if we have corn on the cob, they get the left-over cobs and, if there happen to be a few cracker crumbs or other morsels that Chef-Nyel-the-Thrifty doesn’t need, the flock may score something extra with breakfast.

We think it’s onerous enough for Tucker and Carol to do chicken duty twice a day when needed.  Those Seaview chickens apparently require attention five times a day!!  I didn’t ask exactly how the treats are delivered.  I have secret visions of china and crystal on a low linen-covered board in the chicken coop.  Whatever you do, please don’t mention any of this to our girls and guys!  It might be the one time they’d understand English perfectly.