On the Road to Melba
“Route recalculation… route recalculation… ” God forbid we turn off the road for a refueling break. The calm, disembodied woman who lives inside our dashboard is insistent, persistent and endlessly annoying. The ultimate nagger. But we dasn’t turn her off. Oh, no.
More than once we’ve learned our lesson with that maneuver. She does not take rejection well. She is likely to go into Passive Aggressive mode and simply refuse to speak at all. So, we put up with her repetitive chiding – especially when we are driving in uncharted territory. Like yesterday.
Six years ago when our cousins Phil and Deb moved to Melba, Idaho, we dug out the atlas and did a search. Nyel grew up in Idaho but Melba (population 526 in 2013) didn’t ring any bells. It’s not too far from Boise and, not only off the highway, but off the beaten track and, in most cases, off the map.
Phil and his Jefferson Museum
“I wanted to move to a place that felt like the area where I grew up,” said Phil. He’s one of my Jefferson cousins – related to me because my great-grandmother Julia and his great-grandfather Willard Jay were brother and sister. Julia married R.H. Espy and came to Oysterville but Phil’s forebears stayed in Oregon and raised onions. In the seventy-some years since his childhood, the farmland of his youth has been gobbled up by urban sprawl and he and Deb began the search for greener pastures. So to speak.
They have settled on three acres amid endless fields of alfalfa hay, corn, seed onions and cows. Lots of cows. Lots of manure. Lots of aroma. Our road companion, the omnipresent Greta, had a helluva time getting us here. “Prepare to turn right in half a mile onto West Victory Lane,” she would say. “In three hundred yards, turn right,” she would say. “Now, turn right,” she would say. Then a mile or two of silence and then “Prepare to turn left in half a mile onto…” And so forth.
Up to Speed In Idaho
She got us here, though – in time for dinner and an introductory tour of the property. “There’s a much easier way to get here from the highway,” said Deb. We’ll show you for when you leave. Hallelujah! We are SO looking forward to taking a bit of revenge on Greta Garble. “Recalculation” indeed!
When I turn on Google Maps Amy says, I don’t like that woman! But I do although I admit sometimes there’s an easier rout.