Meeting In Progress

I had distinctly mixed feelings this morning while I watched through the window as people headed to the Oysterville Design Review Board meeting at the church.  It looked like it would be well-attended — many ‘part-timers’ were here for the weekend so that they could add their voices to this important review of our design guidelines and of the county ordinance that deals with them.  I wished Nyel and I could be there to participate, yet I felt some sense of relief that there was so much interest from all corners of the village.  By attendance alone, it had all the promise of a lively and productive meeting.

On the other hand, I felt a bit non-essential which isn’t exactly a pleasant feeling.  And yet it is good to know that life goes on and will continue to do so in this tiny corner of the world.  Sometimes, in the dead of winter when there are only three or four of us in town, it’s hard to believe that the village will continue at all.

Coffee Break

Yesterday, when I told Greg (who chairs one of the committees) that I wouldn’t be able to go, he urged me to just leave Nyel for a bit.  “He’s a big boy.  He’ll be all right.”

I’m afraid my response was a bit testy.  “No, he won’t!” I said.  “He’s pretty much helpless.  He cannot move.”

“Yes, but he can use a phone.  He can get help if he needs to.”

Two double-whammy realizations immediately struck me.  Greg has never had a baby.  And though Nyel is, indeed, non-ambulatory, there are some significant differences between the care-giving required by him and that required by an infant.  So far, having experienced both situations (though, this one for a far shorter period) there are comparisons to be made.  As yet I’ve drawn no conclusions.

For starters, Nyel’s leg-and-cast, weighs many times that of a baby.  Maybe five or six times as much.  Plus it is dead weight — or those are the doctor’s orders for Nyel.  The written instructions he gave me (to be presented to EMTs or anyone required to help transport him) are:
1.  Non-weight bearing
2.  No active hip range of motion X 12 weeks
3.  OK for passive hip range of motion for transfers only
Much of my job when helping him turn or sit up or lie back is to remind him to keep his leg muscles quiet.  Not so easy.  Our legs tend to work in tandem, almost without our thinking.  Best example was when the physical therapist said, “Clench your butt cheeks, but only use the right one; let the left one remain quiet.”  It can probably be done but… (so to speak.)

Betsy-The-Errand-Girl!

On the plus side, Nyel can let his needs be known and, although new moms quickly learn what different cries mean, communication is hardly fine-tuned with an infant.  But total dependency is total dependency and, as much as I wanted to go to that meeting, I just didn’t feel comfortable leaving my very patient patient alone.  I sent a written page or two with our thoughts and after the meeting Betsy Nordquist came over and reported. She said it was a good, positive meeting with many points of agreement among all our disparate residents.  There will be additional meetings before any proposals are drafted.

Perhaps we’ll still get to participate… fully engaged, even if one of us is only half-clenched.