Happy Birthday, Dear Medora!

Medora 1916

Medora, 1916

My Aunt Medora died on January 19. 1916 – just thirteen days after her seventeenth birthday.  It’s hard for me to realize that today marks the 115th anniversary of her birth.

Like all those who die before their time, she will forever remain young.  I can’t help wondering, though, what sort of adult she would have become.  Would she have married?  Would she have had a flock of children – cousins, somewhat older than I, for me to admire and look up to?  Would she have been a doting aunt as was her younger sister Mona, the only one of my mother’s two sisters still alive when I was born?

In her letters and diaries, Medora spoke often of her hopes and dreams for the future.  An August entry in her 1914 diary:

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Medora, 1914

 No, Dorothy and I haven’t quarreled, but I realize at last that she is not immoral but unmoral.  I have half worshipped her all year but now, well, now I just don’t.  I still love her, but she is no longer my ideal.  I want to be good – no strong, for I know we are in the world for some purpose.  Why not make the best of my opportunities.  Each individual counts; even I count.  I am looking forward to a home and children.  Therefore I must educate myself to the best of my ability.  My education will be valuable to my posterity.  A girl is not useless; I am glad I am a woman.  I don’t want to be married till I am twenty-five but oh! I will certainly adopt two youngsters if I am an old maid.  These poor little motherless tots and then hundreds of old maids worrying and fussing because they have been cheated out of so much.  Absurd!  I don’t want to become famous, but I want to help my children to become honorable and useful citizens.  So as they will inherit my traits, anything I don’t want my posterity to think, do, or say, I must overcome first.  It is wonderful that I have it in me to help the world, to make it a little better.  If I had continued to do everything with what will Dorothy say always in mind, I should have become worldly.  This next year I am planning to study.  Mother and Father will be so pleased if I really work hard.  I shall not give up all social duties, but some.  I want to attend church regularly, for though I believe in being broad-minded, we must serve our God faithfully on the day that He put aside for that purpose.  I think Holland Huston, Ruth Connell and Mama are the ones who are stimulating my present views….

The following year, on October 13, 1915, she wrote again about her future but, this time, in a letter to her mother who was suffering some ongoing health problems:   I firmly believe we are put in the world for some purpose and you have been faithful to yours and I shall live mine in single blessedness while I am making you and Papa comfortable. I’m sure I had no such thoughts when I was sweet sixteen.

Dear Medora CMYKOn her final birthday, January 3, 1916, she wrote:  My seventeenth birthday.  Why I am really becoming a young lady!  I shall live this year cheerfully without any sentimental attachment awaiting my prince, and preparing for him.  If in all the long years he never comes, I have lots to do for others.

As it is, Medora will always remain ‘barely seventeen.’  I dearly wish she had lived a long life – long enough for me to know her in person.  She’s been an inspiration, even so.  Happy Birthday, Dear Medora!

7 Responses to “Happy Birthday, Dear Medora!”

  1. Nancy says:

    Moisture around the lids. Some of these words (Medora’s) have been read, previously, but for some unknown reason, this morning they feel as if they have impacted more deeply. Happy Birthday, Dear Medora. You live in our memory hearts.

  2. Wonderful blog, Sydney.

  3. Irene Mydske Pomerinke says:

    Love this post Sydney….it says almost all there is to say as to why I fell in love with Medora while reading your book, it must be time for my once every year or so reading of Dear Medora! Thank you so much for sharing her with us.

  4. Keith Cox says:

    (I recently posted these thoughts on your Facebook “Wall” but thought I’d share them here as well, along with this Blog about Dear Medora!)

    Wow, where to begin…I am no stranger to a few of the books authored out of your love and admiration for Oysterville and the Peninsula upon which the little village rests, but it is only of recent days that I finally was able to set my eyes upon the wonderful collection of memories and words affectionately known as “Dear Medora.” I know you have shared with me how it’s one of your favorites, and with good reason, it’s absolutely “lovely” in so many senses of the word. I was grateful for your decision to include insight to the area and times beyond the letters and diaries, as the context of photographs, timelines, and many other informative means somehow added even greater significance to me at the often elegant, sometimes basic, yet thoughtful words shared between Medora and her parents. Mama’s mention of hoping Medora would burn the letters she’d sent her – giving reference to the treat they would give to posterity – seems priceless as even that note has been included in this wonderful story about life. I was equally taken by the presentation as I was with the words shared by yourself and your ancestors of which they are the focus of the book. It is hard not to carry affection toward Medora and her wisdom that seemed far greater than her age. I was often amused at times as well with Medora’s outlook, such as how she was sick of her friend who kept leading on the boys, how dare her friend (smile)!
    At one point during my reading, I couldn’t help but compare the elegant writing of Medora’s words in her letters home juxtaposed to the texts or e-mails home of most teenagers today. There is an “elegance” which generally speaking seems to be lacking in the modern world, an elegance that seems of a time before that of my own. You mentioned a similar elegance that seems lost upon the younger generation within one of your blogs where you shared how the acceptable dress code of today has changed drastically from the days of old. Being as it may, I am of that generation which unfortunately has sought comfort over “class,” and just like with your blog as with Medora’s words, I appreciate recognizing that change, as it makes me reconsider the “footprint” I myself, will be leaving behind for future generations to look back upon (and hopefully looking up to).
    It’s with great respect that I commend you for beautifully capturing & honoring Medora’s life, as your book is one of the finest presentations of a families’ story as any of which I’ve read. Well done Sydney, well done. The footprint left by you through “Dear Medora,” is not only elegant but a true treasure that I hope will continue to be discovered, and re-discovered for years to come!
    -your friend, Keith

  5. sydney says:

    What a fabulous ‘review,’ Keith! Thank you so much for your insightful comments and for really “getting” so many aspects of the book that were important to me. I am still hopeful that I can find a publisher for my book about Medora’s younger brother, Willard, which I envision as sort of a companion piece to “Dear Medora.” Although, unlike Medora, Willard lived a long, full life and had a stunning career as wordsmith and writer, they were both products of their Oysterville roots/environment with the same family nurturing. I know I need to re-work my first draft (rejected in its present form by WSU Press) but I seem to be a slow percolator. Yet I know full well I don’t have another thirty years to mull this one over as I did with the Medora material. Your words go a long way toward rekindling my interest in getting back to that project! Thank you, again!

  6. Keith Cox says:

    As a director said to me once in an interview I was doing of him, advice given to him by his father…no one will ever truly know all the challenges and obstacles you were faced with in making the movie (or your book), it will be judged for the presentation that it is. And those eyes which judge it, will all be through eyes of vast experience and perspective, so tell the stories you are inspired to tell, with the best ability you have to tell them. The director shared this advice after saying he did not have enough time or money to make the production he wanted as he questioned whether it was even possible to complete, yet creativity in new ways took hold to see the production through, in the end leading to final results which he believes were of greater success than his original imagining.

    It is not a surprise to me to hear you say, “Dear Medora” had be explored and re-explored in your mind and through your pen for over decades, as the work itself demonstrates a well crafted published work. But I don’t think the lack of luxury of time or form of one rejection should make you not pursue a work, if it inspires your heart to be told. Maybe in another glance it will find new means to come together in unexpected ways.

    From the little I know of Willard, I feel it would be a colorful and entertaining read. If your heart is called back into the depth and challenges that it takes to pull off such a book, I hope you find the inspirations to make it happen.

  7. sydney says:

    Thanks, for the encouragement, Keith!

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